Until recently, if you had asked me if I was living my life fully trusting in the Lord, I would have emphatically said, “Yes!” I would’ve said, “and the proof is in all this work I’m doing for Him—leading people to Christ, discipling, writing devotionals, etc.” However, recent events in my life have proven that it’s so easy for me to deceive myself about the degree I am placing my trust in God. While there is no doubt that God has definitely worked through my life to do His eternal work; good works, in and of themselves, are NOT the proof that our greatest trust is in God. In fact, Jesus said that at the end of time, there will be MANY who will say to Him:
“‘Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in Your name, cast out demons in Your name, and done many wonders in Your name?’
And then HE will declare to them:
‘I NEVER knew you; depart from Me, you who practice lawlessness [sin]!'”Matthew 7:21-23 NKJV
Good works—alone—are not proof of a strong relationship with Jesus—our heart must belong 100%—to Him.
Jesus said that proof of our relationship with Him is to love Him more than we love anything or anyone else. When we love Him this way—it is manifested by giving Him FULL control of every area of our life. God’s Word instructs us:
“Trust in the Lord with ALL your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; in ALL your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.”Proverbs 3:5-6 NKJV
As God has allowed a big part of my life to implode, He continues to reveal the cracks in the foundational loves of my heart. I am grateful. But—it’s not easy—in fact, it’s one of the toughest situations I’ve ever been in. You see, our reaction—when our life falls apart and the foundation is ripped out from under us—WILL reveal exactly what or whom we love and are trusting in. I’ll admit, at first I was panicking, scrambling, and working endless hours to patch it all up and save it. But—the cracks were too large. I couldn’t fix it. God made it clear that I needed to start over.
So I began asking God to reveal where I went wrong.
He began to show me that I had been trusting in the organization I had built—more than I trusted Him. Then it crumbled. I had trusted in the people around me—more than I trusted Him. Then they all left. The scenario left me dazed and confused. I was asking God, “Where did I go wrong?” “What do I need to change?” “I’m just trying to do Your work here, so why does it seem I’m going backwards and having to start over???” Then—He reminded me of a song we recorded back in 2018, called “Trustin.'” I had gone backwards and I was once again, “tryin’ without trustin!'” Predictably, the foundation finally caved. I needed to start over. MERCIFULLY, the Word of God spoke clearly to me about what had happened so I had the hope to start over! The Bible says:
“For no other foundation can anyone lay than that which is laid, which is Jesus Christ. [In other words making Him the center of our life.] Now if anyone builds on this foundation with gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, straw, each one’s work will become clear; for the Day will declare it, because it will be revealed by fire; and the fire will test each one’s work, of what sort it is. If anyone’s work which he has built on it endures, [because it was built on Jesus as the center] he will receive a reward. If anyone’s work is burned, he will suffer loss; but he himself will be saved, yet so as through fire.”1 Corinthians 3:11-15 NKJV
Oh, God was so merciful to reveal this to me while I still have the energy to serve Him!!! Now, I am thanking God for allowing my organization to crumble so that I could rebuild it on HIM. I am much better off. Why? Because if God gives me more time, I NOW have the opportunity to build something that cannot be undermined or destroyed by people or circumstances. It will belong to God and He NEVER fails. I’m grateful that I didn’t have to wait until the day I stood before God to discover the futility of my efforts! What I first saw as a great tragedy has actually been a gift from God.
I am thanking God for His presence, patience, wisdom, strength, and love during this time. About a month ago—at the height of this crises—-God gave me four solid New Year’s Resolutions for this year:
- Give it ALL to God; don’t take it back; and get out of the way.
- Give God 100% of my—family, law practice; resources; ministry; time; and heart. Give it all to Him—each morning and sometimes, if necessary—every hour of the day!
- In each situation—train myself to think more about the spiritual opportunities than the physical circumstances.
- Pray out loud for 20 minutes a day.
Thank God, I have been given the opportunity of another day; another year—to fully surrender my heart to Him and prove the efficacy of His plan for me!
We would love to hear your thoughts about this devotional. Did God speak to you or challenge your daily walk with him? Or is there a topic that you would like Kimberly to cover or expound on? Please share with us in the comments below.
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