Marriage is so often entered into based primarily on physical, financial, emotional and/or intellectual attraction; with little regard for a deep spiritual connection. When we choose a marriage partner without regard to a strong spiritual connection—we are headed for failure because—our love is circumstantial.
People say they “fall in love,” but WHAT are they falling in love WITH?
Think about what attracts you to another person and ask yourself if you would still love them if they didn’t have the physical assets or attributes you want. Would you love them if their muscles were saggy, if they lost their hair, if their face was wrinkly, if they lost their profession, if they didn’t have a nice house, or if they were no longer a “trophy” spouse in the world’s eyes?
Wouldn’t it be FAR better to fall in love with someone you would ALWAYS be crazy about?
This can only happen when we understand the kind of love that is NOT based on circumstances. We must come to terms with the fact that—without God—we will NEVER find supernatural love in a non-supernatural being. Do you really want to enter into the deep kind of soul-love that every human desires, the kind of love that exists independent of circumstances? This love necessarily involves God—because humans are all subjects in a kingdom of circumstance—and God is not. God, who is the definition of love—is the ONLY being unchanged by circumstances. He is ageless. Time means nothing to Him. He has self-sustaining power. He is unfailing beautiful. He is richer than every king who has ever lived. He does not change. And…
God’s nature is love, therefore, circumstances don’t change His love.
For all these reasons, doesn’t it make sense that our top priority in finding love should be to seek a relationship with someone who is completely in love with God? Why don’t we then??? Well, it’s because we have been deceived by what the Bible calls “the lusts of the flesh, the lusts of the eyes, and the pride of life.”
“Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—is not of the Father but is of the world. And the world is passing away, and the lust of it; but he who does the will of God abides forever.”
I John 2:15-17
When both people in a relationship love God most, their love is a sacred trust built upon the love of God and is unchanged by circumstances or any of the life events that tear relationships apart. When you love God more than the other person, His love produces selflessness, confidence, contentment, security, trust, humility—which are the opposite of the characteristics which tear down relationships—selfishness, jealousy, roving eyes, insecurity, suspicion, pride, etc. So much grief could be spared if both parties entered relationships with God as the center of their lives.
The greatest love experienced in relationships is when two become one—because of the love of Christ.
“We love Him because He first loved us.”
I John 4:19
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