Valentine’s Day is a sad day for many. A broken heart is a universal experience. Deep in our core, we long for connection, acceptance, and love—and when those hopes are crushed, the pain can be devastating. According to the American Psychological Association, an estimated 40 million adults in the U.S. struggle with anxiety disorders annually, and relationship breakups are among the top triggers for depression, suicidal ideation, and emotional trauma in young adults. One study found that people who have gone through a romantic breakup are more likely to experience clinical depression than those who have not, and some researchers link heartbreak to the same neurological pathways as physical pain.
So when the Bible says, “God is love,” in 1 John 4:8, how does that truth help us when human love fails us, hurts us, or leaves us longing for something that feels so real? I’ll never forget a young woman in my office, sobbing as she said, “I’ve been crushed by love.” She had anticipated something beautiful and wonderful, but it turned dark, disappointing, and deeply painful.
Who among us has not been there?
The reason we go back again and again—even after being hurt—is because God has wired us for love. We hope it will be different next time. We hope real love exists. Because we were created in the image of God, who is love, our undying hope for love is part of our design. But true and lasting love cannot be found in another human alone. No person—man, woman, child, or friend—is love. Only God is real love. And only He can satisfy the deep hunger of the human heart.
When we accept Jesus as Savior, our spirit is made alive, and we are given the ability to love in a way that reflects Him:
“Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love.” (1 John 4:7–8)
This is the heart of the Gospel: love doesn’t begin with us; it begins with God. His love isn’t a fleeting feeling or a fragile emotion. It is deep, broad, and unchanging. To love God’s way is not primarily about receiving love from another—it’s about giving the love that God first gave you. Jesus explained how this works in our practical relationship with others:
“If you keep My commandments, you will ABIDE in My love, just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and ABIDE in His love.” (John 15:10)
Loving obedience to God is the pathway into His love. Not a duty—an invitation. Not a checklist—but a relationship. When our minds and attitudes align with Him, His love flows through us and nourishes every part of our being. The apostle Paul prayed that we might grasp the vastness of this love:
“…that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and length and depth and height—to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge; that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.” (Ephesians 3:17–19)
Imagine a love that is not dependent on another person’s mood, approval, or presence—one that surpasses even human understanding. That’s the love God offers us. This love becomes like a river within us, not a stagnant pond waiting to be filled by someone else.
When we commit our soul, mind, and body to God because we love Him, we become more and more secure in His love. The less we depend on others to fill our emotional needs, the more we live from a well that never runs dry. God’s love fills our “love-cup” to overflowing, and then we are able to love others from a place of fullness, not neediness. There is no greater human love than when two imperfect people love each other with the love of God. Whether parent, spouse, child, or friend, the richest relationships are those bonded by Christ’s love.
If love has sorely disappointed you—if your heart hurts, if you grieve what you thought would be, my friend—seek God with the same passion you once sought love from another. You will never be disappointed by God’s love.
Only God fully heals a broken heart because He is the Author and Giver of the only real love.
Prayer:
Heavenly Father, You are the source of all love. Thank You that even when human love fails, Your love is steadfast. Forgive me for placing my hope in people instead of in You. Heal every broken place in my heart, and fill me with Your unbreakable love. Teach me to love others not from need, but from the overflow of the love You have given me. Root my identity in Your affection for me, and help me walk in the confidence that I am fully known and fully loved by You. Remind me that true love never fails. I surrender my wounds, hopes, and dreams to You. May Your love be my foundation, my joy, and my peace. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
